They say that you’re only as old as you feel, and there’s a certain amount of truth in that. But sometimes it’s a struggle to be young when the calendar – and all around us – say “old”. Still, there’s something positive to be said for the thought that “In the end, it was never about them.” (If I can find the rest of that poem, I’ll try to get it posted here soon. It’s well worth a thoughtful reading.

This is a personal blog. So, with your permission, I’d like to take a moment to get personal with you.

Click here to read on, my friend.

  There is something about the Super Bowl … something other than the hassle of getting through store checkout lines this past week … that grinds me.

In this supposedly Christian nation, every year millions of people go nuts over a violent game played in body armor by absolutely huge men who make their stupendous livings by knocking other men down. There seem to be extra points points awarded for tackling the smallest guy on the field. Well, technically, they go for the smallest guy in a player uniform – brownie points are lost for tackling the guys in the striped shirts.

Some are of the opinion that the game is not violent. But this quote “"It’s an interesting theoretical question, but I don’t think anybody would consider playing NFL football without a helmet,"* would seem to argue otherwise.

Click here to read on, my friend.

Every once in a while I stumble upon that most fascinating of web pages … a quotes page. I’m in a generous mood today, so I’m going to share this one with you. The quotes seem selected with just a hint of an edge to them, a tiny scent of an acid wit and come accompanied by linocuts which you can purchase, if you so wish.

The link above is well into the middle of the site … be sure to scroll backwards as well as ahead.

Here’s a teaser:

You are going to let the fear of poverty govern your life and your reward will be that you will eat, but you will not live.

- George Bernard Shaw

After this has been up a few days as an ordinary post, I think that I’ll make it permanent page and every Friday pass along the best quote I’ve encountered during the preceding week.

I suppose by now that you are hoping I will leave off the rants for a while … and in a while I intend to do so.

But not yet.

Click here to read on, my friend.

Everyone else, listen up.

I hate GMOs (genetically modified organisms) and their insidious sidekick, chemical farming, with the same passion I reserve for pedophiles, politicians, abortionists and big bankers.

Click here to read on, my friend.

I just had a really good day that I am thankful for. It was busy, productive, included good friends, a couple of laughs and some cookies.

What’s not to like about a day like that?

Click here to read on, my friend.

I just got back from my local IHOP and I am IHOPPING mad..

I considered letting the matter just ‘ride’ and being silent about it. But that’s what most other people would do and that’s what allows companies to leave matters messed up year after year … even if they might be inclined, with a little prodding showing that something is important to significant numbers of their customers, to fix them.

All too often we say “I’m only one person, what could I say that would possibly matter?” in a defeatist tone of voice and the little guy inside of us shrugs its shoulders, defeated again. But why is that? Because the voice inside sabotaged the meaning we could have brought to life, the person we could have been, our right to have and express a viewpoint.

Now try “I’m only one person, what could I say that would possibly matter?” again, with the focus merely on choosing your words well, for their effect. So that they WILL matter.

So here, without further ado, is a copy of the letter that IHOP is going to find in its fax machine in the morning.

IHOP Restaurant Support Center
450 N. Brand Blvd.
Glendale, CA 91203
P: 818-240-6055
F: 818-637-3131

Dear Overworked Support Center Staffer,

You have my sympathies. Do I have your attention?

Tonight I went to the IHOP on Middlebelt Rd. in Livonia, MI and, in the process of ordering, asked about the availability of dietary information. After consulting with the manager, the waitress told me that I could find the information on your website. But when I got home and online, I found this instead:

http://www.ihop.com/index.php?option=com_content&task=view&id=21&Itemid=5

» Is nutritional information available?
Currently we do not offer this information on our website.  IHOP offers a wide variety of food that should allow most people to choose a meal that suits their dietary needs. 

Oh, really? How? Psychic readings?

Without this information, THERE IS NO WAY to choose a meal that suits my dietary needs. I don’t know how much salt was in my dinner, how many calories, fiber, protein, carbohydrates … NOTHING! My nutrition books don’t list “little pieces of beef floating in some kind of brown liquid”. Do yours? Nor is there an entry for “some dry-looking mashed potatoes” or “a little corn”.

IHOP is not a small company … it has the resources to provide this information. And, for that reason alone, if for no other, there is no excuse for NOT making it available.

I have a couple blogs (readership ~30,000) that I will be posting this (and any response from you) on.

So, no, you probably don’t want to just crumple this letter up and pretend you never got it.

To paraphrase your website: “The Metropolitan Detroit area offers a wide variety of restaurants that should allow me to choose a meal that suits my dietary needs.”

Too bad that IHOP isn’t one of them.

You are the only restaurant I know of that seems to have too many customers.

Sincerely,

December 6, 2009

Well, that’s my story and I’m sticking to it. If any of you want to write them a consoling letter or even mirror my sentiments, go right ahead … their contact information is at the top of the letter. I couldn’t find an email address on their web site, but I’m sure that at least some of the 30,000 readers who stop by here from time to time have fax machines.

– Bill

My wife and I are in the habit of celebrating our anniversary with a nice meal together. We have gone to Outback Steakhouse, Olive Garden, Big Fish (several times) and a couple buffet places. It’s hard to beat Big Fish – either location – but we’ve had a lot of fun … and good food … trying. If you are in the Detroit area, Big Fish should definitely be on your list of possible eateries.

We have gone solo and we have taken friends.

All good restaurants and all beloved friends.

We usually have dressed for the event but this year went very casually dressed. It all depends on the flow of our lives on that day.

Our anniversary is Dec. 1 and, if you must know, this year marked 9 complete years of marriage – some of the best years I can remember – certainly the best since my children left the nest. It took me four marriages, but I certainly have a good wife now.

This year, a day late due to unavoidable commitments, our observance took us to P. F. Chang’s, an upscale Asian bistro. For Avis, this was the third visit; for me, the first.

Marvelous!

Click here to read on, my friend.

I may have gone to the Red Ruby restaurant for the last time ever tonight.

My wife and I are accustomed to going out to eat after the meeting Sunday. Sometimes we go here, sometimes we go there. Basically, we keep going someplace we like until we begin to tire of it. While our side of town is not known for its ‘haute cuisine’, there are a fair number of places one can go to eat that will not kill either the diner or his wallet. They range from White Castle at the low end to Olive Garden at the upper end.

Now, I’m not saying that White Castle is the lowest place that one could eat; I’ve certainly eaten worse. But it IS the worst place I am willing to go to deliberately. Nor am I saying that Olive Garden is the top ranked ristorante anywhere on earth … but the food is reliably good at prices I don’t have to save more than a month to enjoy.

My personal top-ranked dinery is a little pub in Limerick, Ireland about a 5 minute walk from the Jury’s Inn. Don’t eat at the Inn, eat at the deli across the street during the day and at the pub come evening. Really, it’s better this way.

In between, our neighborhood is blessed with a wide variety of greasy spoon establishments, including a fair assortment of Coney Island restaurants. None of the local Coney Island joints are famous, but most are passable imitations of the real thing.

Duressis, a Macedonian joint on Telegraph, makes decent french fries and spinach pie, but there is nothing in their dogs to set them apart from anybody else. They make the same gut chili from the same thawed blocks of grease that everyone else makes. It’s probably the only time most people eat tripe.

For some time now, my wife and I have been on a Chinese restaurant kick. There is a local Chinese joint with threadbare carpet that serves absolutely the best hot & sour soup on the planet. It’s spiciness and viscosity are spot on. Like I mentioned earlier, its name is “Red Ruby” and it is also on Telegraph, just south of Joy road.

By the third or fourth spoonful of this wonderful elixir of a soup, the floodgates of our sinus cavities have been opened wide and long before the bottom of the bowl (about a quart of honest to goodness soup) all systems are ‘go’ and I am breathing as though through a wind tunnel.

And that’s why I am writing you. You see, I am troubled no end about having to bid adieu to this beloved cookery, yet, wander I must.

Tonight my wife ordered two egg rolls and a large bowl of soup. I ordered a side of pot-stickers, an egg roll and an equally large bowl of soup.

Fine, so far.

Then, as dinner came to its inevitable close (can you believe that she finished that huge bowl of soup before I was half-way through mine? WOW!), our hostess brought us a complimentary set of fortune cookies. I looked at my wife and said something to the effect of “My, you WERE hungry!” She just grinned back at me with a mischievous look that I doubt if many other people get to see, quite pleased with herself.

Mind you, those cookies only come free with a full-on meal … we weren’t supposed to get them.

Avis opened hers and read it aloud and we both had a bit of a laugh at the good fortune that is supposedly headed her way.

Most of the time, fortune cookie fortunes make for entertaining reading … like scanning the National Enquirer headlines in the grocery store checkout lanes. So we usually read them and end the meal with a good chuckle.

But mine said:

“Shut Up”

(the actual text after the break)

Click here to read on, my friend.